I lost my fantasy football matchup this week by 0.96 points. And then, after a stat correction, I won by .04 points! And then, after another stat correction, I lost by 0.96 points.

I hope Week 3 fairs better. šŸ˜”

As always, we are using the Vegas Insider Consensus lines.

Last Week

  • Lauren: 3-2
  • Scott: 2-3
  • Nolan: 2-3

Season

  • Lauren: 6-4
  • Scott: 4-5-1
  • Nolan: 3-7

Lauren’s Picks

Tennessee -5 vs. Indianapolis

Ankles, I’m talking about ankles. Sorry, I had to.. but seriously if the Titans can’t beat Carson Ankles and the Colts by five points or more at home, this team has a long way to go.

Chicago +7.5 at Cleveland

I can’t imagine the Bears losing by a touchdown or more with Justin Fields in the backfield. The Dawg Pound is a tough place to begin the Fields era; however, I think Chicago plays hard for the young, upcoming QB who should’ve started in the first place.

Las Vegas -3.5 vs. Miami

The Raiders are playing out of their minds right now. Derek Carr is questionable for this one, so if he goes down and Nathan Peterman finishing the game then I’ll shoulder this one. But otherwise, the Raiders win more than three behind Carr and versus Jacoby Brissett.

L.A. Rams +1 vs. Tampa Bay

Tom Brady is playing like he’s 28 again, but give me the Rams in a close one in LA. Don’t forget Matthew Stafford is good, too. This could potentially be a preview of a NFC playoff game.

Seattle -2 at Minnesota

I still can’t fathom that the Titans came back and defeated the Seahawks last week. I’m sure Seattle hasn’t forgotten about it, and it’ll show in a thump of the Vikings today. There’s no way the Seahawks lose in back-to-back weeks, especially with Dalvin Cook banged up.

Scott’s Picks

Buffalo -7 vs. Washington 

This has all the makings of a total blowout. The pundits are still questioning the Bills AFC contender status after a lackluster performance in week one. But it’s apparent that Washington doesn’t have the same defensive prowess from a season ago, and Taylor Heinicke isn’t that guy. I’ll lay the points on the Bills. 

Las Vegas -4 vs. MiamiĀ 

What am I missing here? Vegas has looked great through the first two weeks and Miami will be starting Jacoby Brissett today, though I am honestly not sure if he gives the Dolphins a significantly worse chance to win than Tua does. Still, this line feels low. 

Arizona -7.5 at Jacksonville 

Betting Arizona is a tad nerve-wracking to say the least. However, I will continue to bet against the Jags until they give me a reason not to or the bookies adjust and make this line as high as it needs to be.  

Kansas City -7 vs. L.A. ChargersĀ 

This line might be a bit high, but I’m banking on the Chiefs to bounce back after a disappointing loss to the Ravens. It feels like the Chiefs could decide to lay the smack down, but I also really worry about the KC defense. This is really a bet on Mahomes, which always feels smart and good. 

Seattle -2 at Minnesota  

I don’t really trust either of these teams. However, the Seahawks are due to bounce back after a devastating and glorious loss to my beloved Titans. Also, the Vikings defense is absolutely pathetic. I’ll take the Seahawks by a field goal. 

Nolan’s Picks

Baltimore -7.5 at Detroit

Lamar Jackson is good; the Lions are not. This is a lot of points to sacrifice for a road favorite, but there’s a definitive talent gap between these squads. 

N.Y. Giants -2.5 vs. Atlanta

To paraphrase The Athletic’s Sheil Kapadia: ā€œAnytime you have the chance to pick Daniel Jones and Jason Garrett as favorites, you have to take it.ā€ This is as much a pick against the Falcons as is it for the G-Men. Atlanta’s offensive line is atrocious and their defense is nonexistent. Surely Garrett can manage to call a good offense against a nonexistent defense!

Las Vegas -3.5 vs. Miami

This is a square pick for sure. The Raiders value is sky high after two wins over the Ravens and Steelers. The Dolphins value is in the tank, following a 35-0 drubbing at the hands of the Bills.

But 3.5 points feels more than reasonable? I’m betting on the Raiders revamped pass rush against the Dolphins porous offensive line. It bears mentioning Jacoby Brissett is starting at QB, who is sure to take a few sacks.

Green Bay +3 at San Francisco

Kyle Shanahan appears to be playing a game in which he sees how many games he can win while starting his worst quarterback. The Packers haven’t looked particularly impressive through two weeks, and their defense remains ā€œgooeyā€, but I’ll roll with the team that features its best players.

Dallas -3.5 vs. Philadelphia

My heart is with Jalen Hurts and the birds, but Philly’s overmatched in this one. They are down two starters on the OL (LT Jordan Mailata and star OG Brandon Brooks), pass rusher Brandon Graham and safety Rodney McLeod. Those guys aren’t exactly replaceable, let alone on short notice.

Kellen Moore’s usage of Tony Pollard tells me that his priorities are on scoring points and winning games, not playing favorites. That’s a new trend in Dallas and one that I’m buying in on.

Five Things To Watch

JUSTIN FIELDS JUSTIN FIELDS JUSTIN FIELDS

Where else is there to start? Fields presents a sense of hope that hasn’t existed in Chicago since… well, ever. He’ll face a stiff test in Cleveland, but the Bears faithful don’t need a win: They just want a taste of something special. I think he’s going to make one splash play that steals the show, much like REDACTED’s run on TNF or Baker Mayfield’s two-point conversion.

Odell Beckham Jr. makes his return to action in this one, too. Tune the fuck in.

I may have to bring back the Josh/Jaheim scale

The Bills offense and Washington defense were billed as top-five units entering the season. Neither has lived up to the hype. I’ll be interested to see which unit impresses more, though I’m not sure it decides the game — Buffalo’s defense against Washington’s offense is a bit of a mismatch.

Saints-Patriots

New Orleans and New England are almost stylistic mirror images of each other, aside from one key difference. One team’s quarterback is The Dragster at Cedar Point; the other’s QB is like the kiddy coasters I used to ride. Neither team trusts their quarterback. We know what Mac Jones is going to give us: nothing. This game comes down to Jameis Winston and which team he completes more passes to.Ā 

I don’t actually want to watch this game, but it’ll be on the big screen where I’m watching the games, so I have to drum up some interest for myself.

Chiefs-Chargers

After a Chargers athletic trainer stabbed Tyrod Taylor in the lungs — a storyline that doesn’t get enough credit for its bizarreness — Justin Herbert was thrown into the fire against the Chiefs. And he almost upset the defending champs. Patrick Mahomes didn’t play in the Week 17 matchup, so this is Mahomes-Herbert II. Sequels often disappoint, but they puts butts in seats.

Brady’s Debut in Hollywood

Tom Brady and the Bucs are the definitive favorites in the NFC; they are facing perhaps their greatest challenger in the new-look Rams. Sometimes these things aren’t hard to write.